Tuesday, September 24, 2024

Humble and Kind

 Humble and Kind

James 3:13-4:10[1]

Most of you know that I’m a music fan. I grew up in the 1960’s listening to “Top 40” music on my transistor radio. As a teenager in the 1970’s, I “graduated” to a “stereo,” complete with huge speakers and arguments with my parents about whether the music was too loud. But besides classic rock, Chuck Mangione had come along and made listening to Jazz “cool” again for my generation, so I delved into that. My musical tastes have grown and expanded over the years, and throughout my journey, the people in my life influenced me. When I went off to college, my roommate was into what was then known as “soul” music. Later in my twenties, I also began exploring classical music, something my grandfather had encouraged. When my kids became teenagers, they were listening to a whole new style of music. I actually liked some of it, so I tried to keep up with the best of what was “new” in music. As you know my son Michael is a performing musician working with the Navy Band, and he’s usually cluing me into new Jazz artists. And these days, I’m taking some of my cues from my grandchildren! Perhaps I’m not alone in that.

If you were listening closely, you may have missed one genre of music. I didn’t listen to Country music early on, but I gradually added it to my musical repertoire over the years. One of my favorite songs is actually a Country song: “Humble and Kind,” by Tim McGraw. I first heard it in 2018 at Maxine Verhoeff’s funeral (true story), and I loved it, and I’ve listened to it regularly ever since. I love the simple truths it conveys, principles that I was taught from earliest childhood. Like “Hold the door, say please, say thank you, Don’t steal, don’t cheat, and don’t lie.” It reflects a way of life that’s simply “good.” “Don’t hold a grudge or a chip” because “Bitterness keeps you from flying” is wisdom we all need to hear. “When you get where you’re goin’, Don’t forget turn back around, Help the next one in line” reminds us that we actually do have a responsibility for how we treat other people.

The refrain of that song, “Always stay humble and kind,” could be a tag line for our scripture reading from James for today. That might seem strange at first. What James advocates is “being humble and wise in everything you do” (Jas 3:13, CEV). There were some in his community of faith who were speaking and acting in ways that were wreaking havoc. We should probably hear everything James says about “wisdom” in this passage with the echo of everything he has said about the power of words to do great damage, as we heard last week.[2] But at the end of the day, I would say that James saw a person’s speech as one of the most obvious displays of their character. And the gist of the “wisdom” James advocates is being “humble and kind.”

It may be challenging for us to make that connection. We associate “wisdom” with the book of Proverbs in the Bible. If you’ve ever read Proverbs, you know that it’s easy to get lost in all the details. But I would say that the “wisdom” that both Proverbs and James promote is about taking faith and making it real in your everyday living. That may not be your first impression after reading the book of Proverbs, because the way it’s organized can be confusing. That’s why I think most of us tend to ignore Proverbs. But if you read it with a note pad by your side and just jot down themes as you come to them, you’ll soon notice a pattern—wisdom is about trusting and honoring God. And there’s a great deal in there about staying humble and kind in the way you treat others. 

We really shouldn’t be surprised that James sounds a lot like the book of Proverbs when he insists that we take our faith and make it real in everyday life. In this respect, James also sounds a lot like his brother, his Lord, and his Savior. In fact, I would say that the portion of Scripture the book of James most resembles besides Proverbs is the “Sermon on the Mount.” That’s because Jesus also valued the wisdom taught by the book of Proverbs. As James says in our lesson for today, it’s a kind of wisdom that “leads us to be pure, friendly, gentle, sensible, kind, helpful, genuine, and sincere” (Jas 3:17, CEV). I don’t think it’s an accident that wisdom and humility and kindness are all connected to one another. Practicing kindness takes humility. That doesn’t mean we make ourselves into doormats for other people to walk all over. Rather I think it points to a basic orientation toward life that enables us to treat other people with respect.

Unfortunately, that kind of respect and humility seems to be sorely lacking these days. In these days of dividing lines, bitterness and rage, and public shootings, at the very least we see ourselves as better than those “on the other side.” At the worst, we see “them” as enemies. James warns us about that in our lesson as well: he says, “Whenever people are jealous or selfish, they cause trouble and do all sorts of cruel things” (Jas 3:16, CEV). I like Gene Peterson’s translation: “Whenever you’re trying to look better than others or get the better of others, things fall apart and everyone ends up at the others’ throats” (Jas. 3:16, The Message)! The opposite of living by the wisdom of “always stay humble and kind” is an arrogance leads to things falling apart and has everyone at each other’s throats!

That kind of prideful arrogance is never good for anyone. Later in our lesson for today, James quotes from Proverbs: “God opposes everyone who is proud, but he blesses all who are humble with undeserved grace” (Jas 4:6 CEV). The language of the original verse in Proverbs is even stronger: “The Lord mocks the mockers but is gracious to the humble” (Prov 3:34, NLT). That brings us back to the importance of humility as a foundation for life. Practicing kindness means we have to give something of ourselves to others. We can’t do that if we’re stuck in pride or arrogance. Arrogance is a essentially mindset that withholds basic respect from people we think are “beneath” us. Only through humility can we see others as people whom God loves as much as he loves us. And only when we can see them in that way can we give them the gift of kindness.

“Always stay humble and kind.” I don’t know whether Tim McGraw tries to live that way in real life.[3] But I love the sentiment of the song. I think the life of simple goodness it portrays lines up with our Scripture lesson from James for today. We can only be kind if we’re humble enough to treat people with respect and courtesy. To do that, we have to recognize that we fall short just as much as anyone else. We have to let go of the need to “win,” whether that means being right or getting our own way or seeing ourselves as better than others. Only when we practice this kind of humility can we respect other people enough to give them the kindness that has defined godly wisdom from the very beginning.



[1] © 2024 Alan Brehm. A sermon delivered by Rev. Alan Brehm PhD on 9/22/2024 for Hickman Presbyterian Church, Hickman, NE.

[2] Cf. Robert W. Wall, Community of the Wise, 186: “James’s description of false wisdom continues in accordance with the moral calculus that bad ideas are embodied in antisocial actions: garbage in, garbage out. If the words of an unwise teacher, who lacks understanding of the word of God, are fueled and formed by ‘jealousy and rivalry,’ then ‘chaos and every vile practice’ will surely result among those who follow his [sic] lead.” By contrast (ibid., 190), “Words that are ‘full of mercy’ are consistent with the merciful God; they are words of a tamed tongue which have the power to edify and guide a congregation to wholeness.”

[3] The author of the lyrics, Lori McKenna, who won a Grammy Award in 2017 for Best Country Song for “Humble and Kind,” recounts that she wrote it for her children as a way of reminding them of all the things she and her husband wanted them to remember. See the interview with her by Dave Paulson in The Nashville Tennessean, “Story Behind the Song: Tim McGraw’s ‘Humble and Kind’”, Jan 25, 2024, accessed at https://www.tennessean.com/story/entertainment/music/story-behind-the-song/2021/01/25/story-behind-song-tim-mcgraws-humble-and-kind/4228236001/ .

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