Sunday, October 23, 2022

(Not) All About Me

 (Not) All About Me

Luke 18:9-14[1]

We all search for meaning in life in a variety of ways. Many of us center our sense of meaning, purpose, and belonging in our hopes and dreams. Most of you know that I was never very close to my parents. Some of you know that life in my childhood home was more like “All in the Family” than “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Actually, that’s understating things, but I’m trying to be respectful toward my parents. As a result, from an early age a big part of my sense of meaning, purpose, and belonging focused on my “dream” that I would do things “right” with my family. Of course, in my child’s mind the “dream” I had for my family wasn’t quite realistic. But more to the point, my “dream” was really all about me.

I think all of us have some kind of “dream” for our lives. It may be about the “right” career and the rewards that will bring us. It may be about having a certain lifestyle. Living in the “right” house, driving the “right” car, having the “right” friends. “Success” for most of us has a very definite look to it. Often, our dream brings with it the underlying assumption that we’re going to make the “right” amount of money. Many of us have hopes and dreams about family, perhaps involving marriage and children. Of course, life rarely turns out just like we imagine it in our hopes and dreams. But if we’re completely honest, we’d all have to admit that the real problem with orienting our lives in this way is that it’s always all about ourselves.

For many, faith and church are a part of our “strategy” for achieving those hopes and dreams. We try to ensure that what we want will come true by saying all the right words and doing all the right things. That includes how we practice our faith. We go to church so that we can be confident of going to Heaven when we die. But we also do so because we hope it will give us some measure of control over the way our lives turn out. We think that if we go to church, our family will turn out “right,” our career will be a “success,” and life will go “according to plan.” But that’s taking faith and church and trying to make it into some kind of magic way to get all we want in life. And in the end, it’s still all about ourselves.

In our Gospel lesson for today, Jesus tells us a story about two men who went up to the Temple to pray. One man was a Pharisee, and he would have been a respected member of the community. Pharisees were known for their devotion to studying and obeying God’s word in all aspects of their lives. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with obeying God in all aspects of life. But the problem with this Pharisee was that he was living his life in a manner that was all about himself. If you pay close attention to his prayer, it’s hard not to think that he was bragging about himself to God!

The other man was a tax collector. As such he would have been despised by more than just the Pharisee. He would have been viewed as a thief and a traitor to his people. Now, some of us might still think that way about tax collectors, but the situation in that day and time was different. There were a variety of taxes, and some of them were collected by people who basically “bid” for the right to do so. Since it involved paying a fee up front, tax collectors like this man could keep whatever they could extract from people. It’s not hard to see why the tax collector would have been viewed as a thief and a traitor by the public.

Two very different men came to the temple to pray. Both had made their lives all about themselves. The Pharisee had set out to be seen by others as a respected leader of his community by following the letter of the law. And all indications are that he had succeeded in that. For the tax collector, it was about taking the “fast track” to getting rich. He had thrown honesty and decency to the wind, and was basically robbing his own people. But for both of these men, the fact that they were living all about themselves made their success hollow.

Two men came to the temple to pray. Two men not so different in their attempts to live their lives all about themselves, although the paths they took were on opposite ends of the religious and social scale. But I think the real difference was this: one of them was thoroughly satisfied with the way he lived his life. He was quite convinced that his life was right and even pleasing to God. The other one came to the temple not satisfied, or pleased, or confident, but broken. He was so broken that he wouldn’t even look up and he kept beating his chest in remorse. And that’s the whole point of the story according to Luke: Jesus “told this parable to some who trusted in themselves” (Lk 18:9).

That’s one of the most important choices we have to make in this life. It comes down to whether we put our trust in ourselves, in our hopes and dreams, and in our own efforts or we put our trust in God, in his faithfulness, mercy, and love. While the people to whom Jesus told this story would have expected him to say what a good man the Pharisee was and what a rotten scoundrel the tax collector was, he shocked them. Speaking about the tax collector, he said, “I tell you, this man went down to his home justified rather than the other” (Lk 18:14). Jesus said this because the tax collector had learned a lesson that’s important for us all. When we make our lives “all about me,” our hopes and dreams may thrive for a while, but they will eventually collapse. Only when we base our sense of meaning, purpose, and belonging on our trust in God do we really find the life we’re looking for.

That’s the message of a Bible verse that may be familiar to you: “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths (Prov 3:6-7). I don’t think we set out to live our lives “all about ourselves.” It kind of sneaks up on us. For some of us, perhaps our families of origin were such that the only “safe” place we had was inside our own hearts and minds. And that’s where our hopes and dreams took root and grew so strong. And so we put our trust in those hopes and dreams because that’s all we had. For others, we may have noticed that our ideas differed from most of the ones we heard from other people. And so we began to trust primarily in our own viewpoints. This process becomes like second nature to us, and I would say it goes unnoticed. But that’s still a form of making life all about me. And that’s not what life is all about. It’s all about God, and what God wants to do in and through us in this world.



[1] © 2022 Alan Brehm. A sermon delivered by Rev. Alan Brehm PhD on 10/23/2022 for Hickman Presbyterian Church, Hickman, NE. For a video recording of this sermon, check out my Pastor Alan YouTube channel: https://youtu.be/kRzsxfzmyck .

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